Always Sunny On The Farm
by bgotts1997
Summary: In this story the gang is not in there usual setting of a bar but they are living on a farm in Missouri. Follow along as Frank comes up with a plan that lands him and jail and his friends to leave him.


Always sunny in Philadelphia: The gang goes to the farm.

11:15 am

On a Thursday

Roach, Missouri

"Frank what do you mean we are about to lose the farm?"

"I already told you Dee we won't lose the farm if we come up with a way to make a little money!"

Two months back Frank Reynolds was approached by the local police and was told to find a way to pay his taxes or he would lose his farm and everything else that he owned. He has been trying to come up with a new way of making some money but has yet to be successful. But his new idea may just put him on top.

"Charlie hurry up and bring me my gun I have a mission for you!"

"Frank why the hell do you need your gun, every time you get that thing out of its case someone almost dies because of a dumb plan you have to get rich."

Frank smirks at Dennis and turns his back as he gives Charlie the details of his latest and greatest plan, "Charlie I need you to go down the road to the chicken farmer and steal some chickens!"

Charlie shakes his head in approval "do I get to shoot the farmer to"

"God damnit Frank don't give a gun to Charlie, he can't be trusted with a stick let alone a gun!" yells Dee

Just as Mac and Dennis start to defend Dee, Charlie bolts off towards the truck and hops in to go steal carry out the plan that Frank has just briefly explained to him.

Dennis shakes his head "I can't believe you let that idiot do anything!"

While the gang is back at the farm bickering Charlie was on his way to the farm for the task at hand. Frank has always been the one that frank trusts to do all of his tasks, he can't keep a job anywhere else so frank has taken him in as the test dummy of the gang.

"Frank, mac and I have some work we need to tend to in the barn so we will leave you and dee here."

"alright mac you and I both know we can trust a plan that Frank has so I have a plan, we are going to go out and sell Franks cows and use the money to get out of this farm and move to our own place!"

Mac shakes his head in approval "anything to get way from this place and move closer to more women!"

As Dennis and Mac head out to the pasture to round up the cattle, the rumble of a truck comes down the lane as Charlie comes back from a failed attempt on carrying out franks plan at the chicken farm.

"Charlie where on earth are the chickens I sent you after?" Yelled Frank

"well Frank let's just say the neighbors have a big dog and we didn't become the best of friends, but don't worry I have already thought of a solution to our problem."

"Charlie, you couldn't find your way out of a wet paper bag, so I am guessing your plan will go about as well as the first one did"

"Frank just hear me out I promise this idea will work and we can become rich!"

Dee shakes her head with disapproval "Charlie what do you know about being rich? You have never had more than 100 dollars to your name at one time."

"alright guys now hear me out, we bring all the animals in and use them to make our own petting zoo, we can charge for entry and charge extra for food to feed the animals."

Frank lights up with excitement "Charlie I can't believe I'm saying this but that's a brilliant idea!"

"Don't act to surprised Frank I always have good ideas."

"Dee and Charlie, you guys go and round up the animals for the petting zoo and I call the radio station and make fliers so we can sucker some people out of money!"

While Dee and Charlie head out to get, the animals rounded up from the barn and pasture they run into Dennis and Mac already bringing up the animals as they are trying to execute their secret plan as well.

"Dennis what are you and Mac doing with all the cows?"

"Well we were just bringing them up to make it easier to feed them."

Mac shakes his head in agreement "Yeah Dee that's exactly what we were doing, we would have told you but we didn't want to bother you since you're always trying to get out of work"

"Well I can't argue with that"

"So, what are you guys coming out to get the cows for exactly?"

"well Charlie has a plan to set up a petting zoo to make us money so Frank sent us out after the animals so that we could set them up for the kids."

"So, Charlie comes up with the big idea and Frank sits back and does the easy work all while taking credit, typical Frank."

A look of shock comes over Dee's face "Damnit Charlie Frank id trying to screw us over, he isn't going to give us any of this money it's all going to be for himself."

"Well Dee you and Charlie got yourselves in this mess so Mac and I will stay out of this one and watch you all fail."

"Charlie and I will be just fine thank you very much, you just wait and see."

While Charlie, Dee, Mac and Dennis bring all the animals up to the farm Frank is back inside the house printing out fliers and busy calling people to spread the word about "Franks friendly petting zoo" and his dedication to helping the community with the proceeds of the zoo. (just as the fliers are done getting printed dee and Charlie walk in to see what Franks posters say, and to see if he has accomplished anything).

"Frank you're totally stealing my idea, not cool man not cool."

"No Charlie, I had to put my name on it because I am the owner of the animals and I didn't want you to get in trouble by making you sound like a thief."

"Well I guess that makes since Frank, thanks for looking out for me, now when do we need to be ready for people to arrive?"

"The add will be playing on the radio in about ten minutes so we need to be ready as soon as we can, you and Dee go get started and Il be out shortly."

"Dee lets go get to work"

"Dennis, we need to hurry up and get these cattle out of here before everyone else comes to get them for that stupid petting zoo."

"Alright you go get Franks truck and we can get ready to haul them away, and you better hurry I don't want to mess this up."

"alright I will be right back wait here." (five minutes later Mac is back and he and Dennis begin to load the cattle up, but Frank hears his truck start up so he comes out to see what is going on).

"What the Hell are you two doing with my truck?"

"Frank these animals look very sick so Mac and I are going to take them in to the vet."

"They look perfectly fine Dennis, now leave these cows here and go help Dee and Charlie set up for my petting zoo."

"Fine we will go help them."

As Dennis and Mac go up to help Dee and Charlie they come up with a new way to make money since Frank was to suspicious of them taking the cows for that plan to still work.

"Mac, we have to get Dee and Charlie on our side because what we need to do is goa long with Franks dump petting zoo plan but then steal all the money and leave this dump."

"Do you think we can pull that off?"

"Absolutely, Frank is an idiot, you ask Dee and Charlie."

"Dee and Charlie, we have an Idea but we need your help to pull it off, lets rip of Frank and steal all the money he makes on this stupid petting zoo."

"Absolutely I'm in!"

"Great, what about you Charlie?'

"Guys I don't know about this idea, what is Frank going to do with no money?"

"Who gives a shit Charlie Frank is an asshole and never looks out for any of us."

"Alright I'm in" (just as the gang agrees on the plan a cop car comes rolling up the lane)

"Is a Frank Reynolds around?"

"Yes, sir officer let me go get him for you."

"What the hell do you cops think you are doing here without a warrant?"

"Frank Reynolds we came to inform you that if you set up that petting zoo you will be arrested."

"why the hell would that get me arrested?"

"it's illegal to have set this up without the proper permits"

"Well it was all Charlies idea so if you want to arrest someone then arrest him"

"Sir, your name is on the fliers so you are responsible and have to call it off or we will haul you in to the station."

"like hell I do"

frank sprints to his truck and takes off down the lane, the cops stand in the driveway for a brief moment then hop in their car and take off after him. Meanwhile the rest of the gang stands dumbfounded by what has just happened.

"why the hell would Frank not just call off the petting zoo?"

"yeah I mean come on its not like that plan was actually going to work that well anyways."

"does anyone else want to watch Frank get taken down by the cops?"

"absolutely let's go!"

The gang all jumps into a car and takes off trying to catch up to Frank and the police. By this time the police where miles away and closing in quickly on Frank. The gang was closing in on the chase and Frank could see that he was about to get caught but he wasn't going to let that happen, Frank stops the car immediately and jumps out with a pistol in hand.

"put the weapon down Frank Reynolds!"

"you're going to have to pry this pistol from my dead hands first"

"Frank what the hell are you doing?" shouts Dennis

"yeah come on buddy you might want to think this through"

"Frank why are you running from the cops when you could have just taken down the signs for the petting zoo?"

"I'm tired of these cops always bothering me and telling me what to do"

"well frank maybe you should partake in a legal activity more often and that wouldn't be a problem" shouts Mac.

"well it's time to end this right now!" yells frank as he draws his gun

BOOM

"you bastard you shoot me in the arm" yells frank

"well we were not going to let you shoot us first, now were taking you to jail"

After frank is examined by the paramedics he is booked and sent to the county jail, the gang gets in their car and heads back home.

"well the police said Frank will be gone for at least 6 months since he was on probation"

"well what are we supposed to do without Frank around?"

"Charlie, we don't need Frank around we can just sell all his stuff and move on."

"Sounds good to me I will post the for-sale ads on line."


End file.
